Wackiest Diets

Words by Katherine Castillo Eustaquio

If you thought the Lemon Detox diet was outrageous (lemon juice + maple syrup + water + cayenne pepper), think again. Below are some of the weirdest diet fads of all time.

The blue lens sunglasses claim to aid in weight loss by suppressing your appetite and making your food look gross. There’s also the Diet Fork that is specifically designed to give you a hard time eating. Do you know that a 10-piece pack of Diet Fork costs $8.95? No kidding!

When ingested, these disgusting creatures release protein to break down the food you consume. You can eat whatever you want and still lose weight. If you keep the parasites happy, they will multiply and cause serious health problems like meningitis and diarrhea. If you can’t get them in convenient pill forms, there’s always a rack of raw meat to chew on.

Practitioners claim that the surgical staples shot into the inner cartilage of the ear stifle your appetite by stimulating a pressure point. Some say the staples make chewing painful. It’s even illegal in some areas in the US.

You can dip the cotton balls in gelatin or you eat them dry before each meal. This really puts the low calorie, high fiber diet in a different light. Apart from not having any nutrient, imagine the hairball-like attacks you can get.

Used like birth control patches, the skin absorbs weight loss ingredients that get supposedly curb the appetite and increase the metabolism. As promising as it may sound, no clinical evidence can prove such claim.

Unless you can walk to the fridge while you’re asleep, this diet tells us that sedating yourself for days can shed off pounds because—surprise, surprise—you’re asleep. The most prominent follower of this crazy diet fad was Elvis Presley.

Think Flintstones and settle for the fine cuisine available to cavemen during the Paleolithic Era—lean meat, fish, veggies, fruits, roots, and nuts. No sugar added--but don’t worry, they still eat their steak medium rare. So where do we get a kilo of Tyrannosaurus Rex?

HCG is a hormone derived from a pregnant woman’s urine and is used as a treatment for reproductive problems. In recent years, HCG has been found to effectively suppress the appetite as well. This is not limited to women; men can still use HCG if they can get past mood swings, water retention, and getting positive pregnancy test results.

They are basically vegans who refuse to eat salad on a plate. Rather, they rummage for leftover foods wherever they can find them. Yes, even in dumpsters. On the smarter side of things, freegans simply don’t support the meat and dairy industries as they also try to reduce waste by consuming the, well, waste.

Simply suck on these hoodia-spiked ice cubes to keep yourself full. Hoodia is an African plant eaten by tribesman to maintain energy and suppress hunger, especially on long trips.